


Not The Tea Party You Were Expecting

by Blondie_Bluue



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Grumpy Bucky Barnes, M/M, Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes | Shrinkyclinks, Sassy Steve Rogers, art therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2020-01-06 22:33:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18397691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blondie_Bluue/pseuds/Blondie_Bluue
Summary: Nobody knows the Winter Soldier has a boyfriend, until they find out...the hard way





	Not The Tea Party You Were Expecting

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gigglepud](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gigglepud/gifts).



> Hi!! So this is the first thing i have ever written. i just want to thank the Shrinkyclinks fest for putting this together and gigglepud for the prompt Winter Soldier as an avenger secretly dating modern Steve" i had fun writing this. i hope its not too terrible. Also to my betas Stinky_Tarantula and yuuki_Illene
> 
> ENJOY!
> 
> NOW WITH GRUMPY BUCKY ART BY Yokogreyword

Sam and Bucky are walking down the busy New York street towards the Brooklyn VA, on their way to Bucky’s first art therapy session, weaving through the morning rush of people, everyone on the way on their own destination. Sam, with a small grin on his lips, is enjoying his morning stroll. Bucky, on the other hand, hunches in on himself, hat pulled low, hands fisted and shoved into his jacket pockets. The glare that seemed to be permanently plastered on his face has other pedestrians giving him a wider berth than they normally would.

“Man, you have to chill, you’re going to love this. A bunch of the other guys have already said it really helps.” Sam bumps his shoulder against his.

“I don't see how sitting around painting my feelings or making puppies out of clay is going to help,” Barnes practically growls as he side-eyes a group of teenagers squinting at their phones and then back up at him.

Sam sighs. “Just, give it a chance ok? The instructor is a good guy. You might actually like it. Besides, you need more hobbies.” Sam continues before Bucky can open his mouth to reply, “Shooting things and sharpening your knives doesn't count.”

Bucky rolls his eyes at Sam and definitely doesn’t pout like Grumpy cat.

When they arrive at the VA, they make their way into the room serving as today’s art studio. Tables have been set up and covered with cheap plastic tablecloths, with lumps of colored clay and various detail tools spread across them. At the front of the room stands a thin blonde man, not much taller than Bucky’s shoulder, wearing hipster glasses and kneading a large lump of blue clay to warm it up for the morning class. Bucky thinks that he could break this punk into two just by looking at him funny.

When the man looks up and spots them, he blows his floppy bangs out of his face, just for them to fall right back into his eyes, and smiles. “Hi. Go ahead and find a spot, we’ll start in just a minute.” He turns back to his clay and starts dividing it into chunks to pass around to the remaining tables.

Barnes picks a seat towards the back of the room and sits down hard, chair groaning like it might give up on life, and folds his arms across his chest. He watches the tiny instructor finish his preparations. Looking out at those sitting around the tables and rubs his hands together, eyes sparkling, before he introduces himself:

“Hi, I’m Steve, and today we are going to be finding our spirit animals.”

Sam comes up next to Bucky just then, holding out a frilly apron, laughter apparent in his eyes.

“Here, to keep your pretty clothes clean,” he manages to get out with a straight face, eyeing his seen-better-days red henley and torn black jeans.

Bucky, maintaining eye contact, just reaches out and plucks a clump of clay off the table, squeezing it so it oozes out from between his fingers, staring at Wilson with his Murder Glare. Sam just laughs and throws the apron at his face.

Turns out the art therapy thing wasn’t so bad. He did always like playing with playdough when he was a kid and the wolf wasn’t turning out pretty decently. Sam’s falcon however…

“Ugh, I can’t get his wings to stay up,” he grumbles. Bucky just smirks and pinches a bit of clay on his wolf’s head to make his ears.

Steve wanders around the room giving advice and just talking to the other vets about why they chose the specific animals. When the skinny blonde makes it around to Sam and Bucky, he stops to smile, some hidden mischief in his eyes

“Nice puppy,” he comments. “Very soft and cuddly.” Bucky takes a moment to give him a heavy scowl.

“It’s not a PUPPY,” Bucky growls. “It’s a wolf and he's dangerous, capable of killing a man in a manner of seconds. Disemboweling them before they know what’s happening” He waits a moment to see what his reaction will be, practically daring the smaller man to flinch. Steve just bites his lower lip, trying not to smile.

“Hmm, is that so,” he responds. “I mean, you’re scruffy like a wolf but I think you wouldn’t mind a good scratch like a puppy.” Without waiting for Bucky to respond, he turns towards Sam to discuss his falcon. Bucky sits there, staring at the kid’s back. Did he just sass the Winter Soldier? Bucky's face breaks into a small smirk. Maybe he will like this class.

~*~

Bucky starts going to Steve's Tuesday and Thursday morning art therapy sessions, with only a little ribbing and a lot of encouragement from the other Avengers. It's good for him, to do something with his hands that is creating things, and not breaking or destroying. He didn't think he was ever going to be good at anything that didn't involve violence or death. That he could be more than just a weapon to be pointed at a target and ordered to kill.

A few weeks in, Steve suggests that they grab a sandwich after class from the shop down the street. Being able to hang out and do normal things like a normal person was little disconcerting at first but he's getting used to it. Some days are better than others, but he’s getting there. What is really getting to him is the smiling. After the first time he and Steve went to lunch, he came home and noticed his cheeks were hurting. It's getting easier now, the simple jokes and teasing, just sitting in the booth in the deli, his back to the wall, trading friendly insults and silly stories. Sometimes they even go back to the Tower to watch stupid movies on Tony's giant television in the common room, working through Bucky’s list of Must See Movies people keep adding to. Steve vetoes the Twilight series right away.

“Who even suggested that?” Steve exclaims when he reads it, his face scrunching up in a look of disgust.

“Uhhhhh, Clint, I think. Why, what’s so bad about it?” He was genuinely curious as to how a movie about vampires and werewolves could be bad.

“Man,the vampires sparkle when they go out in the sunlight. There is no way we are going to watch this” Steve grumbles as he crosses the title off of Bucky’s list.

Bucky makes a face to match Steves “Wait, they don’t burst into flame? They just, look like they rolled around in glitter? That’s ridiculous.” Steve just mumbles his agreement, still trying to find an acceptable movie to watch.

After a minute Bucky tosses a fist full of popcorn at Steve’s head, some of it getting stuck in his hair, both of them start laughing until their sides hurt and finally decide to watch the Princess Bride.

Once, and only once, they even goto a ball game They may or may not get kicked out for fighting when the drunk fan in front of them won't quit swearing and kneeing the lady and her son in front of them in the head. Bucky thinks that Steve asked the man very nicely to cut it the fuck out. It seems the man does not agree, so Steve may or may not punch the dude in the face after he takes a swing at Bucky. Needless to say, they would only be watching games on the TV in the future.

At some point they end up in the Avengers shooting range, seeing as bucky is a firm believer that every person should know how to handle a gun properly, what with aliens and evil robots falling from the sky recently.

Bucky walks through all the safety instructions and basic instructions, making Steve repeat everything back to him twice and then steps back to watch how the artist handles the weapon. To his surprise steve empties the clip into the target with three neat headshots and a tight grouping at center mass, then unloads and sets the gun down so he can turn with a shit eating grin to see the assassins mouth hanging slightly open,  
“You ass!” Bucky laughs “You never told me you new how to shoot! Where the hell did you even pick that up?” incredulous, bucky just shakes his head

Steves smile gets a little bigger and all he says is “Classified” Then turns back to the gun, reloads and fires off another amazing round of shots to the soundtrack of Bucky swearing.

~*~

“On your left!” Sam yells at Iron Man as he banks to the right, firing both guns at the drone flying through the air. Tony dodges out of way just in time to miss the laser blast directed his way. The Avengers have been fighting these ridiculous things for the better part of the morning with neither side gaining the advantage. The small drones just keep coming; for every one they managed to shoot down another would take its place. What they really need to do is take out the Master Controller that is nestled in the Starbucks on the corner, but none of them have been able to get close enough.

“Where the hell is Barnes?!” Tony yells over the comms, sending two more repulsor blasts at a drone coming up on Natasha’s six. Soon after, another batch comes streaming out of the coffee shop.

“It's Tuesday, he's at art therapy. You know that's his 'don’t contact me unless the world is ending’ time,” Sam shouts back, doing a quick barrel roll to avoid another laser blast.

“Well, this seems to be headed that way,” Tony says, eye roll audible in his voice. “Hey J, call Sergeant Bob Ross and tell him to get his ass over here.”

There's a collective intake of breaths when Clint whispers, “He's going to kill these bots, then he's going to kill us.” Natasha hums in agreement while taking out a drone with a lead pipe like it’s the home run derby and sending it flying into its friend.

“I want it on the record that I was against that idea,” Sam states.

Five minutes later, there's a loud crack and one of the bots drop from the sky. Two more loud booms reverberate and another two go down. Tony turns to see Bucky, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows, hair pulled back in a messy man bun and a streak of paint starting at his nose and continuing across his cheek jumping off the top of a building. He clutches onto his rifle tightly.

“Oh good, you're here. Where did you even get that thing? Do you just have weapons stashed around the city, in case you need to shoot something while on a milk run?” Tony rambles “Whatever, I’m just glad you didnt show up to get stabby with a paint brush or something.”

“It's Tuesday, Stark. I'm fucking busy. What part of 'world ending threat’ do you not understand?” He growls as he swats a bot out of the air with his metal arm.

He continues to punch and stab (with a knife, thank you very much) his way through a small contingent of robots swarming through the streets as he murder struts to the coffee shop on the corner. Finally he storms into the Starbucks and reaches the main bot, a tank of a thing, hopping up on his back and with one good punch, rips out the circuitry, effectively ending the battle. As the drones outside plummet to the ground, Bucky just turns to Stark and flips him off before heading back to the VA without speaking another word.

~*~

A month later Sam comes striding into the Tower common room where Tony is tinkering with something that looks like it used to be the toaster at the kitchen island while Nat and Clint are curled up on the couch watching a nature documentary.

“Has anyone seen Barnes?” He asks the room at large. Three puzzled sets of eyes look back at him. “Steve didn't show at the VA today and he's not answering his phone so I thought maybe he'd know where he was.”

“Haven't seen him since Monday,” Clint tells him, not terribly worried. It's not like Bucky is particularly sociable. Not seeing him for a few days isn't abnormal.

Tony looks up from his project, tilts his head while wondering out loud:

“Jarvis, my man, is Barnes in the Tower?” he asks.

“No, Sir,” the AI informs them. “Sergeant Barnes left the building on Tuesday at 08:00. I believe he was heading to his art therapy class at the VA. I could check his phone’s GPS and send you the coordinates if you'd like.” Tony just looks at Sam, interest on both their faces.

“Yeah J, what's the address?” As the AI reads off the address, Sam's eyes widen.

“That's Steve's address. It's not like Steve to not call in if he's not going to make it. Do you think they're in trouble?” They all look at each other for a moment, each thinking up a different worst case scenario, before they leapt up to get their gear.

 

***

“Okay.” Tony begins as they're coming up to Steve's apartment. “Sam and I will go through the front door, Nat and Clint you go in the fire escape window. Count of three and we'll all bust in.”

Everyone is getting into position when Tony hears a moan through the door. “Did you hear that?” He pauses to listen and hears it again, all he can think is that maybe Hydra had found Barnes while the two men were hanging out. That maybe they had managed to subdue him even after Shuri had removed the trigger words from his brain and left the small artist for dead. A thump and a grunt make its way through the door, snapping Tony back to reality.

“Everyone in position?” He calls softly over the comms “On the count of three, 1….2…” He counts them down.

“Uh, Stark,” Clint begins, “I don't think….” But Tony isn't listening.

“3!” He shouts as he kicks the door down, repulsors whining. From the couch, Bucky throws Steve to floor, his body covering the smaller man's. In the process, Steve had grabbed the gun duct taped to the underside of the coffee table, one arm extended over Bucky's shoulder and aimed squarely at the Iron Man suit, bright red like a beacon, standing at the end of the couch, head tilted so the mask manages to convey that he is VERY confused. Tony looks around and takes in the bottle of lube on the table, the clothes strewn about the floor and the fact that the Winter Soldier is still balls deep in the tiny artist. Eyes widening, Tony flips up his faceplate.

“The fuck is happening here,” he squeaks out.

Steve, still pointing the gun at him replies in a calm icy voice.

“What does it look like? We're having a tea party. What hell are you doing here, breaking into my apartment?” He demands, then puffs out a breath and puts the gun on the floor.

Tony finally gets his senses back, blinks a few time and says,“You didn't show up at the VA and we hadn't seen Barnes in a few days. We wanted to make sure you were ok. Ya know, make sure Hydra didn’t find you or something.”

Bucky finally twists to look at him, murder glare at full force. “It's fucking Wednesday, asshole,” he grinds out, between gritted teeth.

“Uh, no, it's Thursday.” Tony spits back, shifting his attention from Bucky to Steve. “And I was trying to be a good guy and make sure you weren't dead or something. I heard moaning and thought maybe you were hurt and couldn't reach a phone and needed assistance, but I guess you were already be ASSisted. See if I try to help you again,” he grumbles.

Natasha chooses to stick her head in the window there and then.

“We tried to warn you, Stark.” she says, before she shrugs and climbs back out.

Tony just rolls his eyes as Steve and Bucky look at each other with wide eyes.

“Did we…...lose a whole day?” Barnes whispers. “Well that's been a while.”

Steve just rolls his eyes then closes them, letting his head fall back to the floor, slowly rotating it from side to side.

Sam steps around Tony and looks down at the two men, still wrapped around each other.

“Man, I didn't need to see this. I'm going to see Barnes hairy white ass in my nightmares now.” He turns to leave. “C'mon man, let's leave these two lovebirds alone.”

As everyone retreats, Steve's eyes pop open and he yells after them.

“Stark! You owe me a new door, dammit!”

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter.](https://twitter.com/Blondie_Bluue) and tumblr

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Bucky is a grumpy cat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18431666) by [Yokogreyword](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yokogreyword/pseuds/Yokogreyword)




End file.
